Everything’s normal with my life.

A normal house at the end of Tucket Drive, that’s where I live. I like my normal house.

The door of my house opens to a lovely living room. It’s cozy, with big sofas and gentle orange light. There’s a faint smell of earl grey tea. I love drinking earl grey tea on the sofa. It’s very relaxing and therapeutic.

To the right, is my kitchen. My kitchen is a little dirty but isn’t everyone’s? There are stains on the wall. I need to clean that. My fridge is always full of things. Very delicious things, in fact. Full of my favourite foods!

Then around the corner is my bathroom. My bathroom is cleaner than the kitchen because I clean frequently here. It gets dirty very quickly.

There are the stairs to my basement. It’s a very normal basement, full of basement things like old books, furniture, and bodies you need to hide. All normal things to have in a basement, am I right? There’s a body down there of one of my neighbours. I killed him because he attacked me. It was self-defence. That’s normal. If I keep him up here with me, he’ll stink up the whole place, and I don’t want that.

Oh, but I guess he can’t really do anything about it because I cut his arms and legs off. My, he’s just a torso now! I took his eyes too, they’re the most delicious parts. I left them in the fridge. I told you my fridge is always full of delicious things! Having a favourite dish, that’s normal.

Gee, it really was a hassle dragging him all the way into the house, through the kitchen and into the bathroom. When people want to get rid of filth they have a shower. That’s normal.

Everything with my life is normal. The only thing that’s not normal here is that my neighbours are rude to me. They think I’m weird. It’s rude to say in someones face things like “you’re a lunatic” or “you freak”. It really makes you feel all sad and gloomy, you know?. We all know they’re just jealous that I’m living such a normal life. Why do they hate me? I’m kind, caring, everything a good neighbour should be! They won’t get off my tail.

That’s why I kill them. People get rid of things that are in the way or things they don’t want or need. That’s normal, right?

And I eat to live. I don’t have a job, I don’t have money. I eat things that are free to eat. No cost. But I don’t care because I get to eat my favourite foods every day.

I’m not crazy. I’m normal.

I’m normal, right?

“The howling wind was loud on this dark cold night. I thought I was the only one in the house until I kept seeing these shadows looming in every room.
Sitting in my bedroom under the bed I hid, hands trembling, not stopping. 
Creaking and rumbling I heard from downstairs. Occasionally thumping noises, although maybe it was my heart. It was a bane, hiding under the bed. My body aching, desperate to crawl out from beneath the bed. God knows what would’ve happened if I did.”

A sudden, but long groan filled the small room of the bar. “You’re making this up. I can tell. You’re not going to fool me, Richard.” Phil reached for the cold, golden beverage sitting on the counter of the bar, taking a large gulp out of it. It was three in the morning, and nobody else was in the bar except for a middle-aged man who was working a late night shift. Within the time that Richard and Phil were at the bar, the man only spoke a few times, usually when the two ordered their drinks and food. Occasionally, a deep chuckle came from the man, but that was all it was. 

“Phil. Please, believe me. I know it sounds like I lost my mind, but it’s all true. I swear.” Richard says as he takes a sip out of his own. 

Phil laughs mockingly at Richard. “Alright, continue then. After this, we’re leaving.”

“…I thought I was going to die. It was the end for me. I heard something moving up the staircase. Heavy, but almost diffident thumps. I didn’t know who it was or what it was, but I knew it was looking for something. I stayed under the bed, holding both my hands to my mouth to stop myself from making any sound. When it reached the stairs, it stopped there for a minute. And then…then…” Silence fills the room.

“…What?” Phil breaks the silence.

“I saw it. I saw. I saw…something black. Not human. Large. Peeking. Looking right at me under the bed.”

“I bet it was just your wife.” Paul laughs. The man chuckles. Paul asks for the receipt and starts taking his wallet out of his pocket.

“It wasn’t. I swear it wasn’t. It had a face. Large eyes, and mouth. Long body. Some liquid was coming out from all over its body. Something black and drippy. Then I blacked out. I didn’t know what happened after that. I woke up in my bed. A-anyways I don’t know what it was, maybe I was hallucinating but-“

“Yeah, well I hate to break it to you but you’re hallucinating. Enough of the fun bedtime story, let’s go home now.” Paul cuts in, and he leaves money on the counter for the man. “Let’s get going. Cheers, mate.” Paul gets up from his seat. Richard quickly drinks the remainder of his alcohol and sets the pint down onto the counter. 

The two walk past the antiquated tables and decorations of the bar and head towards the door. Ready to embrace the cold weather outside, Richard tenses his body. The cold wind never came. 

“What’s wrong?” Richard asked Paul, who was staring down at the doorknob. Except, it wasn’t a doorknob anymore. Something black, something drippy had been smeared all over it. 

They heard a deep chuckle.